People are generally afraid of the life in the daylight- the Monday mornings, the overcrowded MTC buses, the grumpy boss, the super strict professor, the insurance due, the crush who might turn your proposal down and oh! Did I mention the queue in the ATMs and banks now?
After fighting through the day, when you finally hit the bed and your eyes give in to the fatigue, all what is left of you is a cocoon in deep slumber. The cocoon and the rest of the world become completely oblivious to each other’s existence. Engulfed in the shell of ignorance, the mind embraces a blissful sleep. Little do you know of the monsters under your bed.
But then, all of us have gone through those occasional sleepless nights that would eat us alive. The broken promises, darkest secrets, stolen dreams, severed relationships and buried memories slowly surface just when you start to drown in the darkness.
Remember making your mommy check for the scary monsters under your bed before you go to sleep, when you were little? Well, now they are not scary anymore, right? What is really scary is the silence of the nights, when one struggles to get a wink of sleep. That is when your heart and mind get into the boxing ring. The stupidest decisions of your life will portray themselves as the wisest ones, on your self-designed humanitarian grounds.
As the soliloquy grows louder, with each question you ask yourself, the silence is sure to scare the life out of you. The wail that you stifle when you realize that there’s absolutely zero possibility of finding your lost love and mending your broken heart, the tears that well in your eyes when you find yourself all alone in a hostel room miles away from home, the heaviness in your chest when you are pushed down the priority list of your friends, the sweat that breaks on your forehead when self-doubt seeps in-are all what is actually scary.
The monsters under your bed are actually the ones inside your head. They feed on your fear, not of the daylights, but of passing the night- the night that probably acquires its black contour from the remains of the burning hearts. The seamless darkness further continues to expand and fill the vacuum. Very often, you tend to get lost in the darkness and become one with it. It might take a million of such sleepless nights before you feel the need to keep your sanity in check.
But you know what the silver lining of your dark cloud is? Do you know what is so beautiful? It’s YOU. The courage to face your fears, accept your flaws, grow through the pain and survive to fight the same demons all over again is what makes you a beautiful damsel amidst your distress. It is when you crumble, collapse, and almost die but refuse to give up, the air around you exudes your vibrancy. With every night you cross, you become immune to what was once potent enough to kill you.
Acknowledge your little marvel. Shine through the gloom. Hold on to hope, for the speed of darkness, my dear, is the speed at which we leave the light.
Thank you so much Srimathi for honoring my blog with such a beautiful and inspiring write-up. Can’t wait to see you as a published writer. Much love! ❤